The Little Green Kitten

Jealousy.

It's not with me nearly as frequently as it used to be. I'm not nearly as bitter as I was in the months after my miscarriage (though I'd be a liar if I claimed to be 100% bitterness free). But several of my friends and acquaintances seem to have fallen pregnant at the same time. One of my friends decided to start trying for a baby with her husband about 3 weeks ago...and now she is pregnant. Just like that!

Egads. I know that I've got no business whinging when it's only been a few months, but still...I just can't help but be a little jealous. I'm genuinely happy for my friends, I am. But I'm not going to lie about being a little envious as well.

I've tried something new over the past few weeks. I haven't been hiding my miscarriage, as if it were something to be ashamed of. If I'm talking to someone (who may or may not already know about it) and it becomes relevant to the conversation...I just talk about it. I talk about being pregnant. I talk about having miscarried. I talk about wanting children. As if it were normal, everyday conversation.

And I've found that people have responded. Not in the way that they used to, by averting their eyes, or changing the subject, or looking so uncomfortable and lost. But they've actually responded, and tried to relate to me even though I can tell they don't really know how.

When I hide my feelings about my loss, so do others. And when I step forward and open up about it, so do they.

............

Today is the last day to take a shot at Pregnant Lady Quiz 2. I'll be posting the answers tomorrow!

Yay or Nay?

1. Nosebleeds are a symptom of early pregnancy.
2. Semen contains an enzyme that can cause early labor.
3. The oldest woman to give birth was 61 years old at the time of delivery.
4. The worldwide average of weaning a child from the breast is four years old.
5. After the first trimester, amniotic fluid consists mostly of fetal urine.